I opened my inbox this morning to read of a infertility/adoption heartache of a friend of a friend. Fourteen years on knees, beseeching the Father for children, willing to accept even the honor of bringing an unmet soul into existence. Barren womb, run-away mothers, empty arms. Such grief.
And when He seems to not be answering, what then? When He says no, what then? When all seem cold and silent?
Ann spoke beautifully to this yesterday. A small snip from her heart-tugging, heart-growing post:
She whispers it, “God does loves us, doesn’t He, Mama?”
And I nod and this is always the question and maybe this is all our faith really is — Faith is this unwavering trust in the heart of God in the hurt of here. Unwavering trust all the time though I don’t understand all the time.
God is always good and we are always loved.
Loved enough to be shaped into goodness of Christ Himself.
Oh, but the molding can hurt so. Can’t it? It’s hard to see the Son sometimes…
And we question His love, His goodness.
And He brings us back to the knowing with the little things.
Years ago, it was a simple line that brought me back to the knowing of His love after years of dark doubting. It’s been the embrace of a friend, the tears of a loved one, typeset words, handwritten words – His words or the words of His people. Other times, it has been the counting of the “small” gifts with which He fills my life.
He loves. And even when He seems silent, He knows. (Listen, please. I still cannot seem to embed.)
Here are some verses that I shared with my friend this morning, praying that they would strengthen her heart and help her as she seeks to help her friend to the knowing of His love. If you are in a silent time now, may they bless you today. If the silence is later, may He remind you of His unending love when you most need it. And may we learn to see His beauty and love, even in the cold and the silence.
(4) One thing have I asked of the LORD, that will I seek after:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life,
to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to inquire in his temple.
(5) For he will hide me in his shelter in the day of trouble;
he will conceal me under the cover of his tent; he will lift me high upon a rock.
(6) And now my head shall be lifted up above my enemies all around me,
and I will offer in his tent sacrifices with shouts of joy;
I will sing and make melody to the LORD.
(7) Hear, O LORD, when I cry aloud; be gracious to me and answer me!
(8) You have said, “Seek my face.”
My heart says to you, “Your face, LORD, do I seek.”
(13) I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living!
(14) Wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage;
wait for the LORD!
(10) For a day in your courts is better than a thousand elsewhere.
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of wickedness.
(11) For the LORD God is a sun and shield;
the LORD bestows favor and honor (grace and glory!).
No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly.
(12) O LORD of hosts, blessed is the one who trusts in you!
(25) Whom have I in heaven but you?
And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.
(26) My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
(27) For behold, those who are far from you shall perish;
you put an end to everyone who is unfaithful to you.
(28) But for me it is good to be near God;
I have made the Lord GOD my refuge, that I may tell of all your works.
Rom 8:35-39 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?
Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or
danger, or sword?
(36) As it is written, “For your sake we are being killed all the day long;
we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.”
(37) No, in all these things we are more than conquerors
through him who loved us.
(38) For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers,
nor things present nor things to come, nor powers,
(39) nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation,
will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ!
According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again
to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead,
(4) to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading,
kept in heaven for you, (5) who by God’s power are being guarded through faith
for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.
(6) In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary,
you have been grieved by various trials,
(7) so that the tested genuineness of your faith–more precious than gold
that perishes though it is tested by fire–may be found to result
in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.
(8) Though you have not seen him, you love him.
Though you do not now see him, you believe in him
and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory,
(9) obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God!
How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways!
(34) “For who has known the mind of the Lord, or who has been his counselor?”
(35) “Or who has given a gift to him that he might be repaid?”
(36) For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory
To the choirmaster: according to The Dove on Far-off Terebinths. A Miktam
of David, when the Philistines seized him in Gath.
(1) Be gracious to me, O God, for man tramples on me;
all day long an attacker oppresses me;
(2) my enemies trample on me all day long, for many attack me proudly.
(3) When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.
(4) In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid.
What can flesh do to me?
(5) All day long they injure my cause;
all their thoughts are against me for evil.
(6) They stir up strife, they lurk; they watch my steps,
as they have waited for my life.
(7) For their crime will they escape?
In wrath cast down the peoples, O God!
(8) You have kept count of my tossings;
put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book?
(9) Then my enemies will turn back in the day when I call.
This I know, that God is for me.
(10) In God, whose word I praise, in the LORD, whose word I praise,
(11) in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can man do to me?
(12) I must perform my vows to you, O God;
I will render thank offerings to you.
(13) For you have delivered my soul from death, yes, my feet from falling,
that I may walk before God in the light of life.